Personal Development Speed Rounds: Trusting Yourself
Because we are human, inevitably, we make some questionable decisions in life. Enough of them and any person starts to feel doubt in themselves. Enough doubt and that person will start to distrust their own sense and decisions. Not having confidence in oneself is a struggle that many people identify with. Even the most capable people will doubt their own judgement at times showing how normal this behavior can be. At the same time, we all want to develop the ability to trust yourself and to live confidently.
The key to doing this is separating fear-based thoughts vs. logic-based thoughts. Fear-based thoughts are emotionally derived and can stem from past traumas, insecurities, or worries. Many times, they come from a logical baseline, but emotions exaggerate their implications in our minds. Logic-based thoughts come from reason and often does not have an emotional source. That doesn’t mean we don’t have emotion towards logic-based thoughts. Instead, it just means that they don’t originate from emotion.
The best way to differentiate the two is being in tune with your own body. Our emotions cause bodily changes and sensations. When we are astute enough, we can perceive these changes and understand our emotions better. Next time you feel fear, pay attention to how your body feels. Do you start breathing faster? Do you feel a prickling in your chest? Does your heart rate increase? Now, next time you have a thought that provokes the same feeling, consider why you might have that fear. Was it because when you tried that idea out in the past it led to failure? Was it because someone had ridiculed your idea in the past? Is it because you are afraid of what consequences the idea might have? Whatever might spark the fear is totally valid. At the same time, it’s up to you to recognize why you feel the way that you feel and to decide which path to take. Doing this exercise will build trust in yourself because you understand yourself.
It's important to note that this isn’t the only way to differentiate fear-based vs logic-based thinking. Even using this technique can be hard since many logic-based thoughts can incite fear. What is important is practice and working with yourself and even a licensed professional can help!
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